A little prayer from the world of dreams...

Last night I had a night to myself. A night for myself.  A night with myself.  
I was tired, listened to that, and responded accordingly.  I've mentioned before how i'm an "abuela" (and my utmost respect to all the abuelitas out there!).  And i call myself abuela because i'm guessing an abuela's life illustrates what i'm trying to communicate.  Anyway, my point is that winding down early, winding down peacefully, surrounded by calm and safety nourishes my soul.  
It's where i am now.  I've done the high-energy, outgoing, intense nightlife--there are times when some of that feels quite good too-- but right now i'm enjoying the calmness, the slowness of evenings, disconnecting to technology early, reading, and surrendering to my life of dreams. 
I've been sleeping so well lately! 
You know when you gently wake up somewhere in the middle of the night, eyelids still closed, roll to the other side or maybe accommodate your head in your pillow, and then happily you experience the "ohh, this is wonderful. This feels so good"?  It's been happening to me a lot.  


Today i woke up nice and early, as i have been doing and love, and the day was gray, dark.  But then, all of a sudden i noticed: "hey! i don't feel down, i don't feel gray".  It would be so easy and mechanical to bury my head under the pillow, build a shield with my covers and just connect with low frequency and negativity.  
Previous to this acknowledgment of my state of being, I had the following experience:


I found myself (putting it down in words makes me realize it might be a bit weird) lying on my back, raising my arms to the ceiling and saying "thank you".  Seriously! I. AM. NOT. KIDDING. 
Literally, saying it. 
Mind you, this was 6:40am and I was just waking up.  But i caught myself doing this which then made me:
a) smile
b) giggle a little (out of surprise, not judging)
c) take a deep breath in and then once again continue with that impulse and own a "thank you".
d) smile again. 


Isn't that beautiful? 
Yes. My surroundings today are a little low in light, the air feels cooler, but I know i have a shining sun inside me and i CHOOSE to link to that.  My actions are born from my heart sun and the sunshine feels warm, bright, positive. I say thank you beaming rays of soleil!


Proceded with a cleansing shower and my daily morning yoga practice, ending with Gayatri (to the sun) chanting and prānayāma breathing. Then a warm nourishing breakfast.  Now writing listening, sensing, bossa nova percolating my system.  "Adeus, adeus, adeus..." (Toquinho y Vinicius)


I want to share an amusing video today.  I watched it last night.  I got to it casually and it made me smile, laugh, it touched me a lot.  This lady gives a brief sweep of her life, of her art, of her soul--and it just filled me with beauty. There is so much wisdom behind, in front, around, within this woman.  She incarnates art, she incarnates dharma (vocation, her destiny, duty), she incarnates life and makes me cherish life.  Maybe she was part of the reason why i woke up this morning reaching up to the sky giving thanks.
And she is so funny!  
We are surrounded by beauty, we have so much, we are so privileged and we are ultimately amazing beings. 
THANK YOU. 


** Eva Zeisel

Reflexión

Estoy de guata en mi alfombra, recibiendo rayos de sol en mis piernas y espalda.  Y pucha que se siente bien.  Ah! y escucho Gondwana.  I know, old style, pero anoche en el Txikito (restaurant que trabajo) antes de que la cosa se pusiera CRAZY! en el playlist saltó Gondwana: and i couldn't help feeling this strange pride of Chile and a true deep blue pleasure of listening to the song--which lyrics i knew-- and sing along.."tu, amor...mi vida..estoy amandote.." 
Ay, el amor, el amor...


So, today's blog is called Reflexión.  Yet, i'm not feeling truly "deep" today.  You know when you wake up with the desire to communicate some deep thought, concept, idea o message--which is usually when i'm unconsciously trying to say "it" to myself, and then share it to the world.  
Well, my reflexión del día is that i'm just being.  And enjoying being.  I'm in that frequency.  


Penney Pierce's "Frequency" book is so interesting! (www.penneypeirce.com)Yesterday i read away in the subway (which is where i get most reading.  There, and before going to sleep) the step/phases/process of transformation to higher frequency.  Higher level of intuition, higher energy level.  


I love the idea that we are like tuning forks--and that we can pick up, inspire and then tune up with high beautiful, positive, peaceful, powerful, truthful frequency.  And that change can actually become a reality! 
Also, it was so nice to read in paper, in some tangible medium that what i'm going through is real.  It sounds like nonsense, because i should trust what i'm feeling, experiencing, and that actually because so, it's real. I guess what i'm trying to say is that i didn't feel alone.  I didn't feel a bit crazy--which i have sometimes. 


I have.  Because sometimes I feel things intensely, because i sometimes have these intense dreams that really affect me.  Sometimes my instincts tell me/drive me some place that isn't much in tune with others.  And i've judged that--placing them second or shutting them down.  Again...tuning forks! tuning myself down.  
I'm not in the place where i will stop and dwell in those moments, get stuck in low frequency.  Today i'm being.  I'm being happy with sun in my bum.  
I didn't feel alone, and Penney Pierce was describing things that were shockingly similar to my new "symptoms".  I mean, using words, thoughts, feelings, descriptions, actions, activities that i've used and have been carrying out!  
Maravilloso.
Encouraging. 


Y siento esta linda frecuencia en mi sistema.  Y volver atrás seems impossible, seems absurd..there is only up from here.  Hay momentos y dias que son más difíciles, pero también me inspira el challenge.  Quiero ser lo mejor que puedo ser, quiero el bien que merezco y quiero el bien para el resto. 


Reflexión: respirar, sentirme viva, agradecer la vida, nutrirme, nutrirme, nutrirme. 
Hoy estoy.  Hoy soy.
--Fía.


"It does not matter how slow you go, so long as you do not stop"--Confucius 


"Personal transformation can and does have global effects. As we go, so goes the world, for the world is us. The revolution that will save the world is ultimately a personal one." -- Marianne Williamson 

Kriya Karma

Yesterday was a wonderful day.  I did participated in things i wanted to do, I saw people i wanted to see, and had moments of true presence.  And that's what it's about right? Owning yourself, filling in our largest organ (the skin) and actually sincerely be able to say: "i'm here".


I came across this little wise quote by Mr. Carl Jung, and i thought it was beautiful and quite profound. Something to practice on, or at least have in mind for conscious cultivation, and who knows..maybe self-reflection and transformation? 
(he had this experience when he was twelve--no big deal, no pressure!)


"Suddenly I had the overwhelming experience of having just emerged from a dense cloud. I knew all at once: Now I am myself! It was as if a wall of mist were at my back and behind that wall there was no yet an 'I'.  But at this moment I came upon myself.  Previously I had existed, too, but everything had merely happened to me. Now I happened to myself."


Again, being here. Living your own life. Own, as in owning.  Take hold of the reins of the chariot. Where are you going? 


Together with this question, there are other issues that come to mind: how am I getting there? Who am i traveling with? 
It's important that the main character in this story knows who they are. If not, what's the point? And i don't mean define. Define is somewhat restricting, limiting and already puts so much pressure on ourselves. "Ok, so i'm 'this'..and not 'that'"? or "why am i not 'that'? or if i think i am, why am i not like that person's 'that'? There is expectation, there is comparison, there is measurement, there is failure, there is guilt, shame, sadness, anger..ahhh..depression! and ultimately violence. Violence to yourself, violence to others, violence to the world.  Destruction. 


Epa!...hold on! Is that what I want? Is that the world i want? Not only for me, but for others? For those i love? 
So, now my friends, what to consider and, most importantly address? Action.  Action not only in the physical world, in the physical sense: i will plant a tree, i will recycle, i will stop smoking.  Action begins way before that.  Action begins the moment we experience something, have the ability to reflect on it and be aware. 
It comes through the senses--observe, hear, taste, touch, say-- it comes from the heart, and it also comes from the mind--aha! moments. 


I will repeat myself, but it's necessary: Kriya Yoga (yoga of action): 
Tapah- effort, discipline
Svādhyāya- self study, evaluate, reflect, assess.
Īśvaraprānidhānani- devotion (quality of action), sacrifice. 


Yoga Sutra 2.1: Tapah Svādhyāya Īśvaraprānidhānani Kriya Yogah


Having the ability to observe, notice, identify is crucial..but then, what to do with that? I think it's hopeful, it's powerful, it's courageous(!) to take action.  From within, with truthfulness.  


With this comes the popular, sometimes feared word: Karma.  Karma y just reaction.  Re-action. To every action there is a reaction. It shouldn't be a scary idea.  It shouldn't be this uncontrollable destiny or cross we are bearing. It's actually freeing and quite quite quite (yes, three times) beautiful.  My intentions, my actions, have an impact on myself and on others--and it can be so beautiful and wonderful.  
Imagine if the world truly responded to this phenomenon: would we have abuse, would we have discrimination, would we have violence? 


I'm no saint, I'm no monk, but I also don't wish to be stuck in my mistakes, in what i didn't do, didn't have, or even don't have.  I like to work on with what is my now, right now. What i'm doing, what i'm perceiving, my actions.  They will have their fruits, i know it! I've proved it..in fact, i dare say, it's been proven.  
I'm not afraid of karma.  
If you water the plant, the fruits will come. 
There lies transformation.


I work on owning my life.
I work on peace.
I work on love.


--Fía.


** A video on ACTION (noble peace laureate): worthwhile!

Planting Seeds

Today, right now, as i sit here in the floor receiving sunlight as i finish up my warm breakfast, i feel my mind all over the place.  It's not a feeling of being lost or scattered--it's more of sensing myself, experiencing myself full of ideas and things i want to say.
It's hard getting started, and it's hard battling against the urge to try to get everything out and in a good manner.  See, but that's a mind trick.  It's setting up expectations and living in the future, as opposed to the "now".
So.  Let me breathe in deeply, appreciate this moment, and exhale to feel present and just carry on without the angst of a result.

It's still hard to begin, for what i want to share and write about has great deep meaning to me. It's about education, it's about art, it's about mindfulness, respect, beauty, anger, change.
All of a sudden, as i listed all those concepts, ideas, feelings..words really...i travelled back in time when I was in third grade maybe? and they taught me about brainstorming.  Just write down words, write down what comes to mind and then you'll find the connection.  The link is there, but first just write, write, write.

I've put those words down because there IS a connection between all that--of course-- but the link i make is according to my experience(s) and what i am living and practicing towards.  I agree with what Pennie Pierce, the author Frequency, states: we are going through a big change.  A profound change of frequency.  Old paradigms are proving to be not adequate and accurate to our times, there are huge questions and issues to be addressed, and we can no longer stand ignorant and neutral to such events. At least i can't.

In order for true change, we must evaluate ourselves, be honest, apply effort and discipline..but fundamentally it must come from within.  From inside ourselves and true desire, conviction and devotion of change.  That will then lead to a change in others, and the chain will grow and grow and grow.  Its quite beautiful.
A change of era, a change of frequency.

I'm torn at the moment.  A dear friend of mine just sent me an unbelievable most outstanding beautiful link to a movement/project that is taking place which touches upon all of the ideas that have been brewing and growing inside me.  I will have the link at the bottom of this post, it's only 4 minutes long and i encourage (whoever is reading) to please click play.
As I saw this i just thought: "wow! i'm not alone. wow! this is beautiful. wow! true change is happening. wow! I must share this."
Then immediately i couldn't help but feel a little pain in my heart. As though i had a thorn in the middle of my sternum, creating a little pressure in my heart--producing a bit of anguish, sadness and anger.  All this comes from an embarrassing and incredibly ugly manifestation of what we can do to each other.  Actions of violence, lack of respect, hate and unhappiness.  I mention unhappiness because clearly the people that "performed" these actions are as far removed from life, love, gratitude, and happiness as i can think of.

It's not necessarily compassion, for i truly believe that what they have done is unacceptable and ultimately wrong. Also, it is not enough to just say they are wrong, acknowledge that they are unacceptable, it is necessary to take action and not allow this to happen.

I'm talking about a group of adolescent Chilean (embarrassing) men--for they are no longer children-- who brutally hit and abused another young homosexual man, due to his homosexuality. They damaged him to death. They damaged his family, his friends, the Chilean community and the world.

**in honor of you, Daniel Zamudio**

As i said, action must take place. How, right? There are people that just by the thought of this are taken back and feel somewhat lost about what to do.  Simple things sometimes have a huge impact.  Let this be a lesson. Talk about it, share what is happening, let this not stand un-attended.
Then, simple: look in towards yourself.  Look at your life, YOUR actions, your actions of violence.  What do you find?
I do that.  I practice Ahimsa (non-violence), practice hard, with effort to be mindful of how my actions impact me and others. It's really a beautiful practice. What words do i use? How do i treat myself? How do i treat others? What thoughts do i have? When are you being violent?
We are not all going out there hitting, murdering people (thank the Lord!), but we can be quite violent sometimes.  What message are we passing along to our children? To our future children? What world are we building?
Little itty bitty actions--that commence within yourself-- are huge!
Like an ant, tiny but so strong...
Let us be a world community, and let us build a world governed by what life has to offer: beauty, happiness, love.

--Fía

CHECK THIS OUT!

Tomato and Basil

Fresh tomato and fresh basil.  
Tomate y albahaca.
Bliss...


**SUGGESTION!  OK. Now hit play and keep on reading**

Aren't those flavors just pure freshness, crispness and deliciousness? 
They express everything they contain and entail: sunshine, water, earth, air.  
Aromatic.
Sexy.
It's life!


I just experienced in my colorful, delicious, hearty and healthy dish the combo of fresh tomato and basil-- through my eyes, my nose, my tongue.  
Pleasure...


I take care of my tomatoes, i water my basil plant, and now I am thankful for the food i just received. 
I feel grateful, I feel love, I feel alive.
I am now part of the fresh tomato and basil. 


The sun in bright and shining with joy today, even though it's quite quite chilly, and the colors are just popping.  
I've been feeling so good lately. I don't brag and I don't feel guilty.  I'm just observing and really working on being right here, right now, right this minute.  
It's so true how they say that being good, feeling good makes you want to feel "gooder" and share the goodness to the world.  
It's not about becoming a saint, a neutral being that has lost it's spice or nature.  It's about believing in love, grace, peace and devotion.  
Devotion to our actions, the quality of our actions: what we think, what we do, what we say, what we believe. 
And you know? Life does get better! It does POP OUT for it's beauty, for it's divinity and wonderful possibilities. 
Inspiration surrounds me. 
Art is everywhere.  
My life is art. 
I believe in my rituals, I believe in my actions because they are now responding from a place of awareness.


I like what i just read from Osho:


"The first thing, or the most fundamental thing is: how to live. First: your life is your life, it is nobody else's.  So don't allow yourself to be dominated by others, don't allow yourself to be dictated by others, that is betrayal of life.  If you allow yourself to be dictated to by others--maybe your parents, your society, your education system, your politicians, your priests, whosoever they are--if you allow yourself to be dominated by others you will miss your life.  Because domination comes from outside and life is within you.  They never meet. 
I am not saying that you should become a no-sayer to each and everything.  That too is not of much help. That does not make you free...a really rebellious person lives according to his understanding, according to his small light. And i am not saying he becomes very egoistic about it. No, he is very humble. He knows that his light is very small, but that is all the light there is.  
He says: 'I may be wrong, but please allow me to be wrong according to myself'". 

Mi nuevo ÍDOLO/ My new Idol

Hoy desperté con fuerza, con gran ánimo y desperté despierta.  
Today i woke up strong, with great stamina and awake.  
I will not translate all of this blog, and my first impulse is to write in Spanish and provide a space for my new idol: Iván Fuentes. He is a spokesman for the people in Aysén, a region in Chile that is in trouble and  conflict with the Chilean government.  Fighting for their rights, fighting for a better Chile, fighting for a more luminous beautiful world.  
His words transcend the conflict in Chile, he is an example of what the new era is about: tuning into a frequency of respect, care, love, gratitude.  It's the Era of Intuition.  
He speaks great truths, sends out a beautiful message.  Always with respect, sincerity and humility.  
I wish there was a way the whole world could listen to his message, but i have faith that his energy is being sent out in the world: directly through him, through others, through me. 


Éste hombre es mi nuevo ídolo.  Al escuchar sus palabras no dejo de emocionarme y sentir una hermandad que va más allá de compartir patria.  Su mensaje es tan sabio, hermoso, lleno de luz, esperanza y paz. Me emociona saber que la nueva fuerza del universo-- de respeto y cariño por lo que somos, por el regalo que nos brinda esta tierra-- trasciende océanos y grandes distancias.
Sí, hay conflictos, hay "cagazos" tremendos que enfrentar y solucionar, pero es también el momento de oportunidades y crear un mundo mejor.  Es una gran tarea, y en vez de paralizarnos y dejarnos llevar por la ignorancia, el miedo y el "comfort" (porque quizás nuestra pequeña realidad no se ve tan afectada) debemos juntarnos como sociedad del mundo: ayudar al otro, tomar conciencia de nuestras pequeñas acciones y su impacto entre nosotros mismos y el ambiente.  Cada granito cuenta, la energía es colectiva y el cambio puede ser grande y maravilloso. 


Escuchen sus palabras. La vida es hermosa porque yo, tú, nosotros, la hacemos maravillosa. 
Yo tengo fe.
Yo recibo la luz del sol y luego la comparto.  
Yo recibo el agua del mundo, piso la tierra, me alimento de los frutos del planeta y agradezco. 


Reflexionar, reflect, evaluar, evaluate, considerar, consider...that is a first step.  
Negating, ignoring, will lead us nowhere.
La negación, la ignoracia no lleva a ningún lado. 


***PLAY!!!***

Cambio de Pellejo

I love that saying: cambiar de pellejo. Goes beyond just saying "changing skin". It has a more direct, raw, deeper (maybe even animalistic?) sense to the idea of change. 

The image that comes to mind is a snake. Not very original, I know, but it just makes me think of this creature cleaning off entirely. Sliding through the ground, scratching itself against a tree branch and slowly peeling away...almost turning inside out. 

I used to play with liquid glue, spread a thin layer over my palm, wait for it to dry off and then peel it carefully. The bigger the pieces, the better. Oh it would give me such pleasure! 

I'm peeling off. And it's giving me great pleasure. 

I'm not sure if snakes (which are creatures I particularly do not like) feel any pain through this process, and I certainly did not feel any with my glue game; however I believe there is some degree of pain as we experience deep profound changes in life.

It's like a fever--break it out, sweat it out, and then there's release. 

As a seed that will eventually become a flower--there are some dark, lonely, underground times. But then you breath through the earth and there is air, sunlight and a sky of possibilities.

"Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly".

My road has been rough, dark and tiring. But it's no time to dwell on that any longer. It's time to be here now, deal with what is the now and take action towards what I want to be and want to go. 

That's new. I've struggled on healing, moving forward, owning myself, but getting stuck in the mud of regret, guilt and the no-no's...which was once again bringing me back underground.

That's the point where the shift of frequency must take place, the release, the breaking out. I've been heating up the water and not letting it boil and transform! 

Epiphany?

Epiphany!

I'm ready to boil, I'm boiling baby! I feel the stamina, strength and will to do so. 

I don't particularly like all of me right now--but hey! I see it now! I don't and won't hate any longer. I clean my mirror daily, look at myself and say "I love you. You are the best. You deserve the best".  Literally. I do. 

I feel surrounded by beauty, and i feel my beauty from within. I've made a pledge on not looking back, 

I've set my heart on love. 

I will not break my promise on living each day consciously towards the best i can be. 

I will take care of myself. 

I humbly give thanks to all i have and will walk the road of light and peace. 

**Fly Little Wing (hit PLAY!)

--Fía.

Well she's walking through the clouds
With a circus mind that's running round
Butterflies and zebras
And moonbeams and fairy tales
That's all she ever thinks about
Riding with the wind.

When I'm sad, she comes to me
With a thousand smiles, she gives to me free
It's alright she says it's alright
Take anything you want from me,
anything.

Fly on little wing,
Yeah yeah, yeah, little wing

ARCHITECTURE

I wrote a few days ago about Art.  I like to type it with a capital letter for it deserves it's importance and fundamental existence. In fact, i'll do it all in caps: ART. 
It's just that it really is present in anything and everything. It's all encompassing. I could go on and start writing another blog on the significance of ART in the world, from it's origins to now, and the future! (which unfortunately seems to be acting quite like an ungrateful stepmother locking it up in a closet).


Today i want to talk about a form of ART that is present in us all, that has a huge impact on us all, and that frankly...i don't know much about.  
However my point here is to point it out, turn on the lights towards it, recognize and admire it's incredible power in/on society, and to really just call it ART. 


It's about Architecture.  Designing, creating space. 
Space? Space for us to live on-- where we walk on this earth, where we gather, where we work, where we share, where we sleep, where we make love, where we die. 


Here's my own little story about how architecture has affected me. Born and raised in Santiago, Chile. A city. Grew up in a neighborhood that was all about open space, nature, quietness. When my parents bought that house it seemed like a crazy idea for it was so far away from the center of the city, "where everything is happening". Yes, we had bad radio signal..when we drove past a hill we could tune in to the stations. Yes, some distances were far to travel.  BUT! i grew up with a sense of community and freedom. There were neighbors, there was "la calle" (the street) where we would spend the day playing, running, biking, roller-skating, hiding, climbing.  There were rabbits leaping across the streets at night. There were excursions to pick blackberries. 
Now, that neighborhood has no kids on the street, 2 shopping malls a few blocks away, houses with electric wires, a highway 2 minutes away.  


This is not to damn progress, but to evaluate.  To assess, and observe towards where we are heading.
 
Next, years pass...hit fast forward...i move to New York City 2009. This would be an endless post if i described my living experiences (which include several moving events) here.  My point is that as never before have I taken true value, admired, yearned and respected nature. 
I lived in a basement in New Jersey, spent a winter there..and i can say that i know what depression from lack of sunlight can look like.  I had to get out of there urgently.
Manhattan. This city is overwhelming.  Growing upwards.  A real lesson on maximizing space (i haven't been to Japan which apparently THAT is somewhat of another world). Streets, cement, cement, cement, glass, glass, glass...20th floor, 30th floor, 40th floor, 50th floor and upwards.  
However, there are the parks...and by God, the parks!!! i think it's what has kept me sane.  I truly applaud every single individual involved in creating, building, maintaining the parks.  It's an example to follow. 


Again, reflect.  What life do you want? What life do I want? I don't want city children (which seriously resemble little adults, little old people) that have a schedule, time, place, limits to "play time".  There are "play days" with rules and instructions.  We go here, we play with these people, we do these things, we go home. A task.  Homework playing. 


I feel i'm drifting from the title of this post.  Architecture.  So, it's about design.  Designing life. Architecture beyond building buildings: designing cities towards respect and participation.


The highways, shopping malls, parking lots, skyscrapers are building what? I believe a big part of it is social discrimination, about economical consumption and disconnection. 


This is a talk by Mark Raymond, an architect, and i HIGHLY HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend you hit play. He is an artist, he promotes life through his ART of creating space for society.  He introduces (highlights) Equitable Society: where there is equal participation of society, a unity of people that for our towns, cities, countries, our world.  
Let's encourage education, encourage community, integration and positive living! 


** stick to the video...his last part is very insightful!

NAVY GIRLS

Navy Girls

Yesterday my darling friend Jimena (mi gran amiga compatriota) and I went out on a little adventure. 1:30pm, meeting on the feet of Christopher Columbus  in Columbus Circle we discovered we were wearing practically the same shirt! Navy girls in action!

Proof? 

The sky was blue, the sun was shining and people just seem to give off smiles, laughter and energy. That's what spring does, right? Fill our world with life, flowers and colors.

Our adventure, this week plotted by moi: la femme Sophie, was to take the 1 train down to south end of la isla bonita, hop on the Ferry to navigate off the city of New York and into Staten Island. 

What's in Staten Island? 

Really? I don't know. 

I researched a little bit and apparently there is a zoo, some historical "museums"(?) and I think some restaurants. I mean, people live there! and commute every day into NYC. However, today, I have to honestly say I still don't know what's in Staten Island. 

We were there, yes, but our visit did not precisely take the shape of a "touristy-let's explore the island" kinda trip.

We talked.

We talked.

We talked.

And we talked some more.

We got off the Ferry, breathed the air (which was chilly) and looked back towards Manhattan. The city of buildings. You could feel the rapid flow of energy, like a motor running at full speed, somewhat hysterical. 

Talked some more.

Sat on a bench on the terrace.

A couple to our right was involved in some serious manifestation of love, that included hardworking flexible tongues--just to illustrate the scenario with more detail. Unfortunately, or should I say fortunately?, no interaction was ever established between us (talkative navy ladies) and the lovers. However, in our own worlds, we were united in a larger scale sharing the action of tongue, lips and mouth exercising! 

Us talking

Them smooching.

Jime, did you notice them?

Ok. I drifted off on a tangent. 

Our adventure as simple, "non-eventful" and casual as it might seem was profound, meaningful and full of truth. We shared moments that i'll keep with me for life.  It left a trace in my soul, which i believe living is all about: dejar huellas (leave traces).  Tales to tell your grandchildren, build history. 

It's important to surround ourselves with people that matter--which is not everyone we encounter or meet.  We have to be truthful with who and what we relate to.  We have to be in sync with truth with what truly really matters to us and not feel guilty about it.  So it's not about being "neutral" or incarnate an idea of Mother Teresa, it's about being truthful to our nature and in control of where we are and where we are going. 

Can't wait for next week's adventure...where i'll be in the hands of my amiga...

--Fía.

A Dog's Life

Ahhh, a dog's life! 
How many times have i heard that, thought that or even said it myself as i see a completely relaxed doggie creature, completely relaxed bathing in sunshine? 


They know what it's all about! 
Praise resting!
Praise sunshine!
Praise relaxing!
Praise being slow!


It's something i need to remind myself--sometimes even force myself--constantly. See, i'm a do-er..or i've been stuck in that pattern for years now.  Do, do, do...produce, produce, produce.  FEEL LIKE WHAT YOUR DOING IS IMPORTANT.  If it requires effort, stress, even pain...GOOD! it means it's worth it. 


riiight.  
Makes total sense...
(**there is sarcasm in these lines, just in case**)


Let's not steal from ourselves anymore. Let's not be voracious, hungry, glutinous beings.  What's up with all this everlasting, endless, bottomless, insatiable "having" and "doing" and "should"? 
Let's practice non-stealing and gratitude.  Gratitude of, and with, what we have. It's enough!


Astēya: non-stealing.  One of the practices when dealing with our environment. Our relationship with others. Not taking what is not ours, not taking more than what we need, and...important, not stealing from ourselves. 


It's an interesting, profound approach once you start digging in the layers of what this entails. 
We sometimes feel the urge, the need (uh oh! even more dangerous) to consume, buy, feel the void somehow. 
Next time you feel that impulse, really take a minute and reflect: is "that" what i need? what would it be like if i had "it"? what if i didn't? 


**Sometimes --please do not laugh, it's no joke-- going out for a walk is the remedy.  Or grabbing a book, or  chanting/singing. 


Think (I have been doing so, and it's quite astounding what i've found): 
Are you robbing yourself of affection? 
What about care? Are you robbing yourself of the possibility of love? 
Are you stealing away from your own potential--your greatness-- due to fear? 
Comfort?
or Anger? 






Let's us not feel guilty about pleasure anymore! Let us all have a little doggie inside and lie down, relax our muscles & organs, stick out our tongues and enjoy the rays of sun!

Aventurillas

**PARA COMENZAR CON ENERGÍA!

La vida es una aventura, una aventurilla.  El camino puede ser de pasto, de tierra, puede ser liso y caliente como cemento de verano, de arena, pantanoso...un sin fin de posibilidades y combinaciones. 


Es una aventurilla, de gran importancia y debe ser practicada con gran respeto y gratitud--pero una aventurilla al fin y al cabo.  Hay algo medio coqueto al ver la vida así.  Un "flirteo" con las oportunidades que se nos presentan: una interacción romántica, sensual y excitante. 


Todo lo que hacemos importa.  Y deja su huella ahora y la dejará para mañana.  
Aventurillas, aventurillas. 


Somos criaturas de la tierra, hijos del agua y el sol.  
Hoy siento mi pecho expandido, llenándose de luz y elementos de la naturaleza.  Recibo y luego doy.  
Un acto de amor.  Un acto de creación y de belleza. 


Quiero una aventurilla de "a-de-veras", en sintonía con la verdad e integridad.  
Sintonizar con lo que se ofrece, con lo que hay, con lo que tengo y con lo que puedo dar.  
Ofrenda de amor.
Ofrenda de sol.


Le canto al rey Sol, por su magnitud. Le canto a su generosidad de regalarnos luz, brillo y calor.
Sol, irrádiame con tu generosidad...y yo, a su vez, irradiaré con luz al mundo de hoy. 


GAYATRI MANTRA


Om Tat Sávitur Varënyam
Om Bhargó devasyá dhīmahi
Om Dhiyo yo náh Pracodayät

Sātya. The Truth

I've been on a journey for some time now. A journey towards being present. A journey towards the truth. A journey, basically, towards a new better place-- be what it might be, as long as it's in truth.  


Now, what is truth? How do you get it? do it? know it? live it? These questions are all important, essential, but it's more a matter of working towards it--practice truth as experiences present themselves.  Being aware that we have a choice.  A choice of action.  I am driving the chariot, not blindfolded. It is up to me to control the horses and where I travel.  I'm no passive passenger either. 


So truth. Sātya. Truthfulness. The practice of truthfulness, non-deceiving. 
No lies. In actions, speech, and thoughts.
One of the concepts (practices) introduced by Patañjali in Yoga Sutra 2.3  
Here he advices, shines light on our actions and relationships with others & our environment (yamas). Again, it is a practice, not just an idea.
Together with ahimsa (non-violence), asteya (non-stealing), bramacarya (moderation) and aparigrahah (non-grasping/greediness), sātya (truthfulness) builds up this sutra.  


YS 2.3: "ahimsa satya asteya bramacarya aparigrahah yamah"


Gossips, harmful communication, abusive violent language.  Non truth
Lies, lies with myself, lies of myself, lies to myself.  Non truth. 
Hiding, hurting, deceiving.  Non truth.


Sātya: to live (yes, ātha, present, NOW) in truth with myself and those around me.  A beautiful intention and practice.  A yoga practice in itself. 
I include this sutra in my morning practice, as i finish up chanting. 


Moving on from the yoga lesson of the day.  What does this mean to me? 
Fear. 
El miedo asalta.  
Habit of getting up to run run run away. Avoid.
But why? Isn't that a good thing? A good intention? A healthy journey to begin? What is this fear anyway?


It's vulnerability. Which is wrongly interpreted in this society as weakness, when it is actually powerful, it's strength, it's what allows true communication (with oneself & others) and provides change. 
The metaphor/analogy is usually the following:
I'm sitting down, perfectly safe and warm, drinking my mate opening up, and yet i feel like i'm stripped naked, exposed to a cruel audience ready to be stoned! That's how I feel when i'm vulnerable. Instead of proud and open and available for true connection. There is that disconnect from reality that fear is to blame. 
BUT! 
does it make sense? do these demons really exist? do they have faces? 
to stop and analyze it turns them into dust.


So i'm on this journey. I feel good, i want to feel good, i want to be good.  I'm practicing sātya--which is a continuous hard challenging practice. 
I am vulnerable. I do own a beautiful sensitive heart that i'd like to share.


No more's:
Guilt
Shame
Hiding
Fears
Punishment  


Yes's:
Gratitude
Generosity
Respect
Care
Nourishment


** Song of the day
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.  JUST PRESS PLAY!

squirrels flowers and sunshine

It's a Monday, but it doesn't feel like it. In fact, it feels like a Saturday morning..or a Sunday morning. 
I woke up bright and early, with a clear mind, with gratitude in my heart--feeling pretty great. 


There are days when you wake up just in the right wavelength.  And that is how i feel today.  Feeling this way makes me want to radiate "goodness" back and sunshine and colors and smiles. Just like that wise yoga sutra says (yes, i'm just throwing it out there..casually, because i'm paraphrasing) that/who establishes ahimsa (non-violence) will be free of hostilities around him.  And it's so true.


Have you ever walked around with a light heart, a little sweet smile on your face and twinkle in your eye, and then people just sort of smile back at you? or even dare to say "hello" or "have a nice day"?  Proof, my friends!  


So today the sun in shining, the air is warm, birds are chirping away, squirrels are having a party, and OH MY GOD the magnolia trees are just magnificent! As i was having my stroll in the park, I literally had to stop and admire such a beauty.  I stood by the tree, sniffed the flowers like a curious little puppy (so arousing) and just stood there some more.  A gift of nature.  


Walked some more...in the sun, down mysterious pathways, around the lake down Central Park, then headed to the pavement streets and bought myself some nice fresh vegetables and flowers.  Flowers to myself. 


I came home, had a lovely conversation with my mother, cooked myself lunch: a spicy colorful stew of mung beans and vegetables, topped with aromatic fresh basil from my windowsill plant.  


How can life not be insanely beautiful and magnificent? 


I'm in love...


Fía.

I wanna be 50

This yearning: "i wanna be 50" has been on my mind for years. 
Don't know where it comes from, what it responds to (exactly) or what i'm trying to run away from--cuz, that is a possibility too.  


Is it that i possess an old soul?
Is it that i'm avoiding certain responsibilities or experiences?
Maybe, maybe. 


I've shared this story with some people already, but i remember clearly sitting down, having dinner in a restaurant with my family celebrating my mother's birthday.  Funnily enough, i don't really remember how many wonderful primaveras ("springs": years) she was turning.  Not important.  The point is that she was 50+. 
Given my usual behavior, at one point of the evening i placed the world around me on hold and just checked in with what was going on inside me. Imagine this teenager (13 maybe?) opening her eyes wide, zombie-like, staring at everyone around her with a soft smile. Somewhat of an Ally McBeal moment--when she takes us on a ride to her own thoughts and impulses.  Well, there i was, "on hold" and just thinking: "ufff, (breathe in, sigh) this is life.  This is what i want.  Have this."


What did that mean? It meant I saw this amazing, wise, grounded creature surrounded by love (because we all were exuding and sweating love towards her) and life and stability. I'm not saying it was/is perfect. I'm not saying it was effortless, i'm not saying life is an Italian restaurant dinner celebration with laughter.  Oh no.  But she was somewhere in life that had a special quality of energy.  A certain pace, rhythm, heartbeat, space. 


I remember wanting to be there. I want to be there.  I now say it not from a 13year-old perspective--but that was still something pretty strange to acknowledge.  And i meant it.  Didn't care about the school parties (i did at some degree, but this just felt IMPORTANT, WHOLE), didn't care much about the shopping, or impatiently wait to be in the cool 20's.  I wanted to have the ease of the 50's. Knowing that i'd understand things more clearly and handle/attend what was really meaningful in my life. 


I know now that it doesn't necessarily have to be like that.  There certainly are some troubled 50 year old individuals, and age does not mean wisdom and clarity...at all.  It's a metaphor, i guess. 
But no, i still want to be 50.  


I've always been so attracted to that age: when you are still active, the manic energy has settle down, and life is managed differently.  I love white hair, which i don't have! (and i say that because i'm amazed at how many of my friends do) I like the way the body is carried out at that age. 
It's funny because one of my most precious memories come from afternoons observing my mother, my second mother Ade, my grandparents.  Oh god! I remember those afternoons en el Dante (street where my grandparents lived) smelling their age, experiencing their conversations and activities.  Ay, hugging my tata Gaston's belly, holding his hands, exploring his ragged nails (two were specifically yellowish "thanks" to cigarettes), touching his bald head.  And my Tati, my grandma's delicate way of moving, her peacefulness and attentiveness.  Sitting afternoons with her in the living room or terrace asking her about her experiences. Which she would tell me, and i would demand full descriptions!!!


I've always loved to learn household activities.  How to cook, how to make a bed, how to wash clothes--ok, clean not so much (although i'm a clean freak).  Sitting in the kitchen and just take it what was going on there. 


Now i am at such ease at home. I love home time.  I'm very active, i can't stay still and i'm constantly creating, making up things to do...but then there is home. Ahhhh, home.  Being barefoot, comfortable clothes. Growing herbs, knitting.
I'm living in New York and the party scenery is NOT attractive to me at all! I love walks--morning walks, afternoon walks, having tea! and then come back home, unwind, have a shower, bath, read and be "en el sobre" (bed) by 11pm.  Ready to wake up at 7 the next morning.  Ahhh life! 


I'm I an old lady?
How does that fit in busy, productivity-based, competition driven life? 
I've decided to accept the way i am, not be cruel to myself and push myself to some idea of what i should be like, what i should enjoy, should, should, should.  


We are all different creatures, we are all searching creatures, beautiful creatures. 
This is me...at least now. 

** This is dedicated to my Tata and my Tati, my grandparents.  For giving me the gift of everlasting beautiful memories.  Let this be a gift of gratitude to our elders, our parents, our ancestors--where we come from, which have inevitably helped us become who we are:

ART

Art
Arte

Que seria de la vida sin arte?
Could life exist without art?  Definitely absolutely not.  To begin with, it's impossible. Just take a look around, at our world, at the way nature works--it's system-- and you'll see that art is right there.  It is essential, it is our root, where we come from.  I believe it to be the source of life.  Life existed through art, the art of life, life is art. Sounds redundant, sounds illogical maybe?

A good friend of mine once said these wise deep words, and it hit me profoundly--as though i had never heard it before, even though i have been studying art, defending art, creating art for years.  It was a beautiful hot sunny summer day in the state of New York and we were heading out of the city to enjoy a day at the beach: Fire Island to be exact.  So we were on our way, leaving the busy noisy city, in a van...on a field trip, just like in a school bus, like children, feeling free and happy.  Several conversations happening simultaneously, laughter, singing, moments of tranquil silences (probably i was a bit quiet looking out the window, being my usual kinda-introvert).  Then, somewhere along the way my friend says: "Art is the best of everything, anything." He gave examples like: the best pencil is art, the best highway is art.  I looked at him, startled and truly gave space and minute to let those words sink in.  Those are powerful words.  So true.

Art is tricky. There is no way to put your finger on it.  There is no formula, no instruction, no measurement.  We've all heard this before.
I'd just like to add to those wise words that art also comes from the intention of the best.  Again, you can't measure it, you can't really discriminate as to what it is/isn't, when it is/isn't.  I believe intention is key.

That brings me back to what yoga's fundamental principle, fundamental goal (Mr. TKV Desikachar says it so directly and wisely): Take you (each individual, with it's own constitution, it's own individuality) to a new better place. To achieve a stillness, focus of mind and sustain it.  That is the practice of yoga.  Practice which entails action.  Action in life (in and out of your mat) in all its areas, aspects and levels.

Now isn't that art?

In fact, how can you then separate art from anything? Art is like the thread that unites the world, unites us all.

I try to live my life through, with, for art.  Following this idea.
I believe it's beautiful.
I believe it's positive.
I believe it's powerful and not idealistic.
I strongly believe it can bring changes, it can be brought to practice, and build new better things.

That is why i'm so profoundly surprised, hurt and insulted when i see our world being robbed from art. Children being denied to access and engage with such a practice: because it is not "useful" or "important". Says who? How so?
What world are we trying to build? (if building is what we need--i'd like to think we should go back to basics and "acknowledge", "thank", "respect" and "protect")

Education is key.
Education of life, our world, our humanity.  Not of tests and numbers and dollars.
Don't you think?

** Here are some videos worth watching, words worth listening, ideas worth sharing (TED!)
(i'm including a trailer of a beautiful documentary)

-- TO BE AND TO HAVE

-- EL SISTEMA

Café au lait

I don't drink coffee. I don't drink milk.
Café au lait.
Coffee and milk.
Café con leche.
Not for me.


I'm a tea-kinda gal.  Tea lover.
In fact i'm now sipping from my mate gourd a beautiful blend (homemade) of fresh ginger, black pepper and a cinnamon stick.  Mmm..delicioso! Ayurvedic delight.


My point to café au lait, is that it instantly transports me to the image of sitting down and talking with someone.  Sharing an experience. Sharing ideas, laughing, sharing dreams, listening.


Isn't a nice chat energizing? Meeting someone you empathize with, someone you respect, admire, love.
Isn't it a blessing? A moment of connection, a moment of bondage of souls, miraculous. 
Sometimes you might feel down, low of energy or just not with the right motivation--then you spend some time (un momentito) with a friend, a kindred spirit, and you see yourself back in tune with yourself. You feel alive, you feel free, warmth through your body, light in your eyes.  The perfect remedy!


Yesterday was kind of a gray-ish day.  Cold (after two marvelous sunny warm days), I knew i had to go work--my hostess role.  It wasn't a horrible day, nothing was wrong really, it was more toned down.  I did have one highlight though..i was going to meet my friend Daniel for some tea in a little french cafe. 


Going underground has never been much of my thing. I say that because subways make me feel so disconnected and sort of suck my energy...specially when the trips are long.  I'm a sun creature! 
So, i was heading downtown to Chelsea, involuntarily closing my eyes--even though i wasn't particularly sleepy-- it's a contagious tiredness.  Let me just say that it's incredible to see how many people are falling asleep as they ride the subway.  And time of day isn't an issue.  8am, 10am, 1pm, 3pm, 5pm, 6pm, 10pm does not matter. 
Continuing on...i was one of them: closing my eyelids and dozing off every now and then.  Thinking to myself "how am i even going to make it to tonight's shift?!" 
Walk out, walk a couple of blocks to the final destination.  
The smell of coffee hits me as i walk in.  Not bad smell. I like the scent of coffee, just not the taste. 
I sit down, take in my environment.  I like it. 
Daniel walks in, and boom...the miracle happens!
I'm charged again!
There is excitement, there is smiling, there is the desire to connect, there is energy!  
We talk away, share about our lives, plan about the future.  Non-stop. Being in the moment.  Atha.


Me: Earl Grey
Him: Cafe au lait.


I take a couple of seconds, every now and then, just to acknowledge: "wow.  this is wonderful.  this is what life is about! this is what makes me, us, live for."  


And i walk out of the cafe (wishing we could've had more time) with light beaming out from the top of my head, shining sun out of my heart, feeling blood run through my veins.  Feeling alive.  


That's what it's all about. 


There is nothing like a good encounter, a good conversation.  No machine could ever replace that.  
It's about the smell, the temperature, the breathing, the human connection.
Grandioso.
This song is beautiful, mellow and good-spirited. If you have a moment, just listen...

Get up, Stand up.

Leí esta carta que mi hermano me envió. Y esta es mi respuesta:

http://rbb.cl/2es6

Comparto lo importante y necesario que es conocer la realidad cotidiana de una familia chilena de "clase media". 

Personalmente me produce gran empatía, tristeza y preocupación por lo descrito: es una angustia constante por el costear la vida--una vida honesta, simple, sin lujos. Y, repito, un sentimiento de angustia...cuando la vida debería ser hermosa, gratificante y llena de oportunidades (a todo nivel, no sólo económicas). 

El costo de la vida...

Pienso en esa frase y siento que hay algo medio venenoso con ese decir. 

Sí. Hay sacrificios, esfuerzos, trabajo, lucha, disciplina; pero plantearse el pasar por esta vida como un "costo" conlleva una connotación de descontento, de entrega/pérdida sin retribución (en vez de un flujo de dar-recibir), y siento que priva de libertad. 

Lamentablemente esa es la realidad de muchos. Estar encadenados,como Segismundo, a una torre sin poder desarrollarse ni expresar su verdadero Ser (con sus potencialidades) al mundo. 

Cómo vencer esas cadenas? Cómo volcar el sistema tan injusto e inhumano? Cómo cambiar el enfoque sobre lo que significa vivir, existir?

No se trata del dólar, de producciones masivas de "necesidades ficticias" y desechables. Nos hemos convertido en una población hambrienta, glotona, insaciable. Es triste, y sinceramente me duele ver que somos una masa mal-tratada. Abusamos del planeta, de nosotros mismos, maltratamos al hermano, al vecino, a nuestra pareja, a nuestros padres y ancestros. Y nos hemos acostumbrado a este comportamiento: se ha convertido en un hábito de nuestras acciones, pensamientos y sentimientos.

Tal como las cadenas y la inhóspita torre, ésta es nuestra "realidad". Como víctimas y victimarios de este abuso hemos perdido noción y MEMORIA de lo esencial de la vida, de que nuestras intenciones y acciones tienen consecuencias, que la vida es maravillosa, que el sol sale y nos brinda luz todos los días, que no estamos solos y que la raza humana es una especie más en este precioso planeta. El sufrimiento y la tortura no es normal.

Yo soy optimista. Tengo fe y creo profundamente en el poder del cambio. Yo he estado en un lugar muy obscuro (conmigo misma y otros) por mucho tiempo, pero veo y siento los rayos de sol perforando las nubes tras la tormenta. Y ahora yo me siento llena de luz por dentro. 

Yo creo en cambiar la frecuencia--entonar con cuerpo, mente y espíritu en lo positivo y en grandes cambios hacia un buen vivir. Un vida que todos merecemos. Creo en la fuerza que todos tenemos si nos unimos hacia el camino de la felicidad, el agradecimiento y el respeto. Para eso se necesita conciencia, esfuerzo, acciones y fe. Cada acción importa, cada uno de nosotros importa--grano a grano, piedra a piedra, semilla a semilla crearemos un mundo aún más maravilloso. 

Hay temor al cambio, y está la tendencia a ser incrédulo.  

No es un mensaje iluso y de ideas---es de acción.  

Yoga Sutra 2.1: Tapah Svādhyāya Īśvaraprānidhānani Kriya Yogah

**Yoga de Acción: Esfuerzo, disciplina; Evaluación, Conciencia, Reflexión; Devoción, Sacrificio.**

Bob Marley knew what he was saying:

-Fía