Writing bursts out of me, like bubbles, when I'm in a state of peace, when I find some kind of alignment between my external world and my subtle body.
Throughout these past weeks I've found myself in dis-ease. I've felt shaken, broken, crushed, and crumbled. I've worked hard towards the goal of awareness, of un-veiling the --oh so many-- false identities and attachments we are drawn to.
We believe we are where we work and what we do.
We believe we are what we wear or how we look.
We believe we are how much money we have, we earn, and how much we can attain.
But the hard, yet simple truth is that we are not.
It's scary to embrace this fact for it is unknown, and it has no guarantees nor measurements. There is no recipe either on how to reach an answer-- if there ever is AN answer.
Faith. That's what guides.
Faith sometimes creates resistance because it is related to religion and dogmas.
"Ishvara Pranidhana": surrendering (pranidhana) to a higher source (ishvara).
Words such as 'devotion', 'trust', and 'humility' speak of this concept. It is the grace of practicing the giving in of what is greater than us, surrendering to the grace of being alive.
Connect with your heart. Align your thoughts with your actions. Understand that there is no one else just like you, and that we are all extremely special and worthy.
My troubles come when I can't find that alignment. When I get blurred away with clouds of fear. My senses become numb with doubt and insecurity. I'm caught in a whirlwind. I'm in a sand storm.
I paralyze.
I cry.
I never thought I had so many tears.
I lose ease.
I'm in dis-ease.
I'm slowing down, I'm sleeping, I'm breathing, I'm beating.
My heart center is healing.
I'm intense.
I'm sensitive.
I need not to think this has to change, or that it's a hindering aspect of my Self.
I need not to think there is something wrong with me.
Intensity is a part of me.
I must nourish and foster my intense heart.
My lion heart.
