Oh I'm on my way, I know I am, somewhere not so far from here All I know is all I feel right now, I feel the power growing in my hair Sitting on my own not by myself, everybody's here with me I don't need to touch your face to know, and I don't need to use my eyes to see I keep on wondering if I sleep too long, will I always wake up the same (or so)? And keep on wondering if I sleep too long, will I even wake up again or something Oh I'm on my way I know I am, but times there were when I thought not Bleeding half my soul in bad company, I thank the moon I had the strength to stop I'm not making love to anyone's wishes, only for that light I see 'Cause when I'm dead and lowered low in my grave, that's gonna be the only thing that's left of me And if I make it to the waterside, will I even find me a boat (or so)? And if I make it to the waterside, I'll be sure to write you a note or something Oh I'm on my way, I know I am, somewhere not so far from here All I know is all I feel right now, I feel the power growing in my hair Oh life is like a maze of doors and they all open from the side you're on Just keep on pushing hard boy, try as you may You're going to wind up where you started from You're going to wind up where you started from - CAT STEVENS
All words that have been beating inside me. Running through every bit of my body. This is not just poetic talk, but it's been a bit of a theme lately-- questioning the existence of fate. Is destiny a part of my life, something i believe in?
I'm a strong believer that things happen for a reason. I do have faith on the all-empowering knowledge, a certain logic, karma to life. Understanding karma as "action-reaction". For me there is no luck. There are only opportunities to see, grab on to, and savor. Opportunities rise constantly, rise according to our actions, our intentions, our curiosity and our attraction.
So, then...destiny?
Is it pure chance that i met you?
Is it casual?
Is it vain?
The things I feel respond to what?
My being here,
our timing,
is what?
There is no blind goddess turning the wheel blindly,
we build,
we can build.
Yet i feel it not trivial,
but willful.
The will to live,
i have.
The eyes to see,
the skin to feel,
the mouth to taste.
I hear.
Is it pure chance that i met you?
Is it pure chance that i'm here?
right here, right now.
Wheels that turn, fates that are sealed.
Sealed and opened.
Opened and burned.
Samsāra.
The cycles of life.
The everlasting flow.
The births and rebirths.
The continuous wheel of existence.
"He flows into himself".
Whether you believe in reincarnation, that this is just one more passing cycle, one more realm in which we were born and from which we will die. Whether it is your belief, or not, there is one reality we can not escape from: death. All of us, one way or another, sooner or later, will no longer participate actively in this present world.
For one, this premise does not scare me. It used to. An automatic current of thought submerged my whole body and created this huge terrifying wave making me feel and think: "death is absolutely horrifying, scary, my enemy." There was also the idea that with death I was "cut short". Death meant losing something...a whole lot. I sometimes recreated the moment of death (it mostly, happened while I was on a plane, past 4 hours off the ground), and my monologue began: I didn't do this! I won't be able to do that!"...
So what am I doing at this moment? I have that. I found a great relief, an indescribable joy, freedom and responsibility placing the focus on the other end. Not running away or ignoring the presence of death, but welcoming it. Yes, remove the veil of avidyā (ignorance) and really observe, perceive, the presence of death in everything.
I once read this beautiful description and illustration of life and death: we are butterflies. We are born, have the divine possibility to transform and fly. We can only do so because there is life and death. As butterflies we have one wing that is life, and one that is death. We can only fly with the presence of both. Each just as important, each symmetrically a part of us.
Our life is not egotistically more valuable than anyone/anything else.
Yet it is extremely important, magnificent and divine.
We have star divinity, rich powerful magma inside.
Where do you fly with the wings of life and death?
I cherish life and have become more and more in love with its beauty.
I'm in love with you.
I'm faithful, I'm passionate, I'm caring, I'm loving.
(Immature love says: I love you because I need you.
Mature love says: I need you because I love you.)
