Sea of Ideas

So this is day two--although it really isn't actually the second one-- of my new path.  As I type and even think about the sentence I just wrote a question jumps right in: why measure? why count? 

And what might sound like a simple little question takes me on a loop and something that has been surrounding me, bathing me like an ocean wave-- what makes me calculate, measure things all the time? why? what for? As though life were a competition, a board game (much like monopoly) where there is a bank, money, points and little squares to move forward, backwards, get stuck in "jail" or even lose a turn. 

Wow. 

And then through self-inquiry I can feel every fiber in my body cringe, quail, tremble, shake. It is very complex though, because at the same time I can sense the "programming" of years and years that responds exactly to that very mindset.  

I can sense it creeping up stirring my waters. And a battle takes place. 

It comes accompanied with low vibrations, where the main characters of this fictitious play is Fear, Guilt, Pain, Punishment and Exhaustion.  All these ghostly figures that once I name them and recognize them make me realize that as the writer of this play I definitely want to make them go away in Act I, scene I. 

I don't need that, nobody does, and it is my choice to bring them to life..

No...i'll probably make them plan a trip together somewhere, and tragically make them pass away--all together, lost in a canoe in some storm in a sea of turbulent waters. Or maybe to make it a bit less dramatic, have them go on vacations to a paradisiac beach, where through sunshine, ocean, sand, music of nature decide to stay there...indefinitely.   

Then the sun comes out, scene II and beautiful beings come to play: Tranquility, Love, Kindness, Faith and Generosity. And the play unfolds...these characters inside me, within me, all me. 

It is a different kind of play, it does not necessarily follow the traditional standards of playwriting and action.  Time, place and setting are important, but it is all interconnected, all happening organically in the present.  

Where are we going? Who knows!

What do we want? It is an on-going inquiry leaded by love and honesty. 

There is movement, there are actions, there are thoughts, feelings, plans.  

There is creativity and overall energy with stability and light.  Light: clarity, luminosity, ease, lightness.

No measuring.

Swimming in a sea of ideas, creativity and presence.

So this all brings me back to my first sentence and the concept of life in numbers, achievements, gaining, buying, selling, consuming, wasting, wining and losing. 

Who is keeping score? Myself? Some invented fictitious entity that I (we) will meet in some misty future? 

Īśvaraprānidhānāni-- devotion, faith of divinity (and our actions), surrendering to results and expectations.

  

I am breathing, walking, swimming, flying in today's sea.  That's all...